Out Here Tryna Survive
This podcast is a trauma-informed, hope-oriented, safe space. It is a warm hug of solidarity for Black women 35+. It is a celebration of our resilience thus far & our determination to not only survive but THRIVE.
Join me, Grace Sandra, a Mama, author, advocate/activist, storyteller, for some good ole self-love shenanigans.
We are braver than we believe✨
Out Here Tryna Survive
Ep 16: Chile. The 92% ARE TIRED.
Can a powerful group of women change the political landscape of a nation? In this episode, I explore how Black women have consistently been at the forefront of political activism in the United States. With the startling statistic of 92% of Black women supporting Doug Jones in Alabama, I delve into the critical role they play in pushing back against alarming executive actions. As part of our discussion, I bring to light the importance of resilience and solidarity, reminding us of the collective strength needed to navigate these tumultuous times.
Personal well-being and community building take center stage as I unpack the emotional and physical toll of activism on Black women. History shows us that while Black women lead social justice movements, they often do so without sufficient support. I share cautionary tales, like that of Eric Garner's daughter, to highlight the dire need for self-care and community-centric efforts. As social services dwindle, mutual aid becomes a lifeline, and I emphasize the necessity of balancing activism with nurturing our own health and well-being.
I recount my own journey towards a healthier lifestyle, highlighting key areas like physical health, relationship-building, financial stability, and mental well-being. Through personal stories, I encourage listeners to embrace change, manage stress, and focus on self-growth. This episode is not just a call for empowerment but a guide to readiness, arming listeners, especially Black women, with the tools to face future challenges.
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what in the actual fuck is happening here in this, here, united States of America, like what is going on? Hey, girl, hey. So today's a little bit of a different episode. I'm deviating from my usual plan. I'm sitting here, I got my sweatpants on you can't see on YouTube but my legs are up. I've got my warm cup of hot tea with honey because I'm having throat issues, so I might be sucking on a cough drop throughout this episode a little bit.
Speaker 1:But I had planned for a Valentine's Day episode for the first time in my life y'all. I had planned ahead enough. Okay, I never plan ahead. I'm trying to be more diligent and responsible and consistent with this podcast. I planned ahead enough to even plan that I was going to have on a little heart sweater, which I'm showing y'all on YouTube if you're watching, and my little red pop socket filter for Valentine's Day, because this episode today is February the 4th. Today is Tuesday, february 4th, but this episode is going out next week. So happy Valentine's Day week y'all. And I wanted to do a special Valentine's Day episode, but I felt like, in light of the current events, like that's just really not the tip I'm on. So this is just like a little bit of a deviation, just to talk about what in the world should we do or not do about this current regime. Let's just call it a regime. And on top of all that y'all, I ain't got nothing to talk about for Valentine's Day.
Speaker 1:I am single as a MF and Pringle. I am by choice. I have no roster, not a single roster, not nothing. The list is empty. And I'm smiling because I'm really, really. It's just a good feeling to feel at peace with an empty roster by choice. So I'm not going out on Valentine's Day. I don't have plans. Ain't nobody taking me nowhere by choice? I definitely could choose one or two or three or four if I wanted to pick one to take me out somewhere, but I would rather, honestly, be by myself. And, and actually Valentine's Day falls on Friday, which is the day I always have pizza movie night with my kids. So I'm going to do that for Valentine's Day. And we're all single. My sons had girlfriends and now they don't, and so we will all just be together on Valentine's Day. Single is Pringles together and it's a glorious thing.
Speaker 1:But anyway, y'all, let me just introduce you to the podcast If you're new. This is a hope oriented storytelling space. A warm hug of solidarity from me to you and an encouragement and in celebration of our resilience and our desire to not just survive but to thrive as well. I am Grace Sandra. I'm an author and activist, a mom and just a woman who's very deeply interested in Black women surviving, and this administration has me a little bit scurred. So let's talk about it.
Speaker 1:Welcome to episode Y'all. Where to even start? There's so much going on, as we all know. The president has made so many executive orders. A flurry of executive going on. As we all know. The president has made so many executive orders, a flurry of executive orders in the last. You know what has it even been? Has it even been 10 days, 19 to 30? Less than two weeks. It's been less than two weeks in the amount of damage that he's caused, the amount of division that he's caused, not just him, him and all his cronies, including the man who bought him the presidency, his little bitch, ilanazi. We just gonna call her Ilanazi because that is what she did on inauguration day with the thing, which I'm not gonna do, but y'all get it.
Speaker 1:It's just been a crush of one detrimental thing after another that not only did Black women prepare everyone, for we planned for it. There are several organizations that literally formed themselves up within just days to mobilize around Kamala, and now we are called the 92%. The phrase 92% refers to the percentage of Black women who voted for Doug Jones in the 2017 special election for US Senate in Alabama and has since become a symbol of Black women's political power and activism and is often used to celebrate their role in social and political change. It talks about how there's t-shirts and merch now, how social media campaigns are using the hashtag and Black women activists are organizing around the idea of 92%. All I know is that Black women came out in droves to vote against this maniac.
Speaker 1:Because we knew. Because we knew and it is not entirely, completely surprising what's happened, even though it feels like oh my God, like, wow, our democracy is crumbling. This is surprising, but at the same time, it's like he literally told us he was going to do all this stuff. We literally had the Project 25 playbook. We literally had it. Everyone could look at it. And why would we believe a felon who says, yeah, I'm not about the Project 2025 thing? Why would we believe him? Black women didn't. I don't think there was any black women who were like oh yeah, yeah, he says he's not going to do Project 2025. And I believe him. The only one who did, we all know, is Candace Owens, who is the. You know, I'm not gonna say, I'm not gonna say what she is, but we all know what she is. But anyway, I think it's safe to say none of us here respect her opinion, we'll just leave it at that, okay.
Speaker 1:So yesterday my friend posted something that I hadn't seen before Our acting Undersecretary of State for Public Diplomacy, darren Beattie. In October. He tweeted competent white men must be in charge if you want things to work. Unfortunately, our entire national ideology is predicated on coddling the feelings of women and minorities and demoralizing competent white men. And I saw a different friend who, like, reposted that and she just she's a white woman and she was just kind of like in shock and awe and just, oh my God, I can't believe he said that and I can't believe that he was still hired, and I can't believe and I can't, god, I can't believe he said that and I can't believe that he was still hired, and I can't believe and I can't believe and I can't believe, and I was just thinking like the idea that men think that white men think they're being demoralized, the idea that white men think that they are the only ones competent and capable of doing anything. It's not a new idea to me. It's not a new idea to, I'm sure, a lot of you.
Speaker 1:I knew at a very young age I mean I'm talking five, six, seven that little white boys thought that they were better than the girls. And I knew that little white girls felt like they were better than the black people Because I grew up in going to white with a white family, going to white churches, white schools and living in a black neighborhood and participating with some of my black family members sometime. So I had a foot in both worlds and it was very obvious to me from a very young age that little white boys were being socialized, that they were better humans and more competent humans. I think it's just something that all black people know. I mean, tell me if I'm wrong, but like all black people know, when you're raised in America that everybody else thinks they're better than you. So for them to say it out loud, they're saying they're saying it out loud now and ever since Trump got elected he's, he's doing it all of it so out loud. You know it was kind of kind of a little bit in the subtext of. You know when he was running in your face. You know when he blamed the DC crash recently on DEI.
Speaker 1:Now that it's being said, I think a lot of white women are ruffling their feathers and maybe even, maybe even some black folks. I don't know, I'm not speaking for everybody, but I know for me, as a black woman raised in America, this is what they've always believed. There is no moment in the last since I've been alive in the mid 70s, where the white collective was not like. You know what. We're going to be repentant, aware of how, what we have done in this country and the ramifications and, and even now, the fact that we don't believe that black people are good enough to do the jobs that we hold. There hasn't been any of that there's, there's another. There's never been anything that's actually been like a true showing of reconciliation in any meaningful way that would lead towards any sort of meaningful change behavior or mindsets or collective thinking.
Speaker 1:So here we are, here we are, and the question is number one how is it going to affect us? All of this is going to affect us in major ways. I pulled up. I just did a quick search. What are some of the ways that the new regime is going to basically affect Black women? And it brought up five things that are true.
Speaker 1:Changes to reproductive health and rights. You know, knowing we already have disproportionately high rates of maternal mortality, these restrictions are going to further limit access to life-saving care, but the ripple effects of state-level abortions and the bans are going to be stark. The second one was the diversity, equity and inclusion dei shifts. So, as we know, on the first day back he vowed to undo the progress of dei, which is you know what? It's ridiculous. I don't even have any words beyond. It's just fucking ridiculous. But anyway, for black women, we often already experienced, like all these barriers in the workplace, as double minorities, as both women and black women. But this is going to lead to less pathways to get to the top, basically, and will leave Black women more vulnerable to discrimination and with fewer institutional mechanisms for recourse. Say something.
Speaker 1:The next one is updated tariff policies. Entrepreneurship has offered a realistic path for Black women to achieve financial independence. Basically 61%, according to a survey by Goldman Sachs in 2024, 61% of black women view entrepreneurship as a necessary pathway to creation excuse me to wealth creation anyway. The tariff policies, especially on imported goods, could negatively affect industries where black women are prominently represented can I even talk represented including beauty, retail and health care. These policies and limited access to capital, which has been an ongoing challenge for Black women entrepreneurs, could destabilize the sustainability of their businesses.
Speaker 1:And then, finally, healthcare access and chronic health disparities. So the administration is trying to cut back on the Affordable Care Act and reduce Medicaid funding. Black women disproportionately suffer from chronic conditions like hypertension, diabetes and fibroids, conditions that are significantly worsened by not having access to quality health care, something we already struggle with. But with the things that the administration is trying to do, many Black women are going to face the prospect of losing critical health care access, and for those in undeserved communities, these policies create additional hurdles. And then, finally, civil rights limitations. The scrolling back of the Department of Justice's civil rights oversight has raised concerns among advocacy groups. So there's going to be weakened enforcement of anti-discrimination laws in housing, education and employment, which will disproportionately impact Black women, who often face intersecting forms of bias. The regression of these protections could heighten systematic challenges, leaving Black women more vulnerable to exploitation and discrimination.
Speaker 1:By the way, I'll put a link for this article. This is by Forbes, called Five Policy Changes Under Trump that Will Impact Black Women. I mean, we don't even really need that list to know. Shit's about to be real fucked up. Let me just take a drink of my tea. Oh, I put way too much honey in it. That is so hot. I meant sweet, so sweet. So what are we going to do and what are we supposed to do?
Speaker 1:I have heard that the 92% is saying we ain't doing shit. We about to sit back and let y'all deal with it, because the thing is, there is enough white people in this country. There is enough white women in this country. There's enough people who voted for Trump. 53% of white women voted for Trump. There is enough of them who can protect this country from completely falling apart and crumbling without us. So what does all this mean for black women and what we should do?
Speaker 1:Moving forward, I have seen everywhere the 92% is taking a rest. We just go sit back and chill, because this is some absolute fuckery and we have been on the front lines and put our bodies on the front lines way too many times, only to find out that no one is behind us. Who is thinking about us, who is supporting us, who is there for us, who? I think this is a great time, like I've seen so many other Black women say this is not my idea. This is a great time for us to truly prioritize our own lives, our own self-care, and to found and support movements that are rooted in our own success and meeting our own needs and meeting needs for one another, because y'all buckle up, it's going to get crazy. I've just seen so many Black women say it's really time to focus on ourselves and our community and that's been, you know, challenging for me, because there's a part of me is someone who's always considered myself to be an activist and an advocate. Like I said, there's a part of me that's like no, well, I can't, I can't step down. Like I don't want to step down. I want to still be sharing, I want to still have a voice, I want to still go to protests. You know, I want to still teach my Black daughter that, like we can be part of the fight, we can be part of the. You know the resistance, the resistance, resistance. You know what I mean that we can do something. And, at the same time, it's a very confusing time to be a Black woman because, while that is still the core of who I am, it makes a lot of sense to me that if we don't directly pour into ourselves, we will not be there to lead any exchange, any protest, any fight.
Speaker 1:If y'all recall, eric Garner's daughter died not too long after him. Fighting and fighting, and fighting. And she was young. She was young when she died and she died from preventable health conditions. And a lot of that, I believe, is because she was putting her life and her body on the front line to fight for justice for her dad, and I think that she did a noble thing and a beautiful thing and she sacrificed herself and, at the same time, if she had focused on herself and her own self care and her physical and bodily health, she could be around for a lot longer. Because, as we know, this is not absolutely not a sprint. This is a marathon. We are gearing up for a marathon, especially for those of us who have kids.
Speaker 1:Like, it's crazy to me to think about sending my kids out into this world. My kids are eight and a half, 15 and 19, so they're, all you know, in these next five to ten years, going to be pushed out into this world that we've created for them, and I cannot think about running myself into the ground in the next four years of Trump's pregnant I keep saying pregnancy on accident of his presidency and not be there for these children who are being pushed out into this crazy world as Americans Like nah. I have to see this as what can I do today, february, today is Tuesday, february 4th. What can I do today to love and care for myself so that I can be here for them on, you know, february 4th, 15 years from now, 2025, 2040. Man, that's weird to think about, but y'all get what I'm saying. I literally want you to stop and think about if we're going to fight this regime, be here, try to love ourselves and love others. How can we care for ourselves so that we're here to do that?
Speaker 1:I was just telling my girl the other day. I was like man, I'm so discouraged about everything that's happening and everything he's doing in these executive orders, and what if we lose this and what if we lose that? And how are people going to manage without food stamps? And I was just getting caught up in it and I was like it made me not want to do anything. I just had this epiphany. I told her I was just thinking about like how, you know, mutual aid is going to become so important as social services are dialed back and just support and people being actual in an actual community is going to really matter now more than ever.
Speaker 1:And I was just thinking like, I love giving. I've always loved giving financially. I've always been someone who has given financially. It's just a part of who I am. If someone asked me for money and I have it and I want to give it to you, I'm going to give it to you. You never have to pay me back. Nobody owes me any money because I never tell anybody they got to pay me back. That's just how I live and I have been. I have experienced the karma of that in the good way, where when I've needed money, people have given me money and never made me pay them back. I just love giving. I love giving a mutual aid.
Speaker 1:And I thought the other day like girl, if you don't get your shit together and get out of bed and get over the hump of your sadness and how incapacitated you feel at what's happening in the world, how can you ever have enough money to give to anybody, to any mutual aid if you ain't got no money for yourself. I literally wrote it out on a sheet of paper like how? Because I was finding myself feeling so stressed about how I could just focus on me, how I could just be part of the 92% who's like, man, fuck y'all, I'm just focusing on myself. And I had a very strong case of like survivor's guilt hit me. It was really weird. So I was like, let me journal this out. Y'all not believe in journalists. I was like, let me just try to figure out. Like what in the hell?
Speaker 1:So I stopped and wrote down what does it benefit anyone else for you to be broke during this time? What does it benefit anyone else for you to be broke during this time? What does it benefit anyone else for you to sit around and feel sorry for yourself? That's not self-care. What does it benefit anyone else at this time if you are not mentally stable? What does it benefit your children if you can't mentally like pull yourself together, because this is all so overwhelming? And you know that did it. It snapped me out of it because I was like, oh shit, it don't benefit nothing, no one, not. Hold on, let me take another drink. I just want you to consider what you can do to focus on yourself, and not just to focus on yourself, but to really build.
Speaker 1:And yes, I'm talking about money in part money, because we are going to need it for ourselves and for each other. And for me, really thinking about and focusing on money exclusively is just something that it causes a little bit of like. I don't know, I guess I have money blocks, but that day that was yesterday or the day before when I sat down and write out what does it benefit me to be broke, that really helped me. I was like, okay, let me set these money blocks aside, because there were times in the past where we have had to build our own churches, our own schools, our own whatever, and that required money and whatever our ancestors did back in the day to acquire the funds to build up whole cities from the bottom with nothing, barely any education. I'm just that's, that's where we're from, that's the kind of resilience that we're from and in this day and age, with all of these options and all of these things we can do, even though we're exhausted and it's hard, I think there has to be some focusing on how can we build? How can we build. How can we get more? Not so we can be selfish and have Chanel bags and not that that's selfish in and of itself but not so that we can focus on random little luxuries that really, honestly, don't matter at the end of the day, but because of the fact that we know that part of our actual resistance is caring for ourselves, and we know we live in a climate, in a society, where it costs money to care for yourself. It costs way more to buy a banana at the grocery store than like a big box of chocolate, cheap ass marshmallow bars that are killing us. The banana, the single banana, costs more than the box of these chocolate bars. Y'all know the ones I'm talking about. They have all the sprinkles and they're really good, but they're so, so horrible for you.
Speaker 1:I want to encourage you, as black women, to think about all the areas that matter to you. What are the top three or four or five areas that matter the most to your well-being, and focus on that. And when I tell you, I have been writing it down, I've been scripting every day and what I'm scripting is those areas I first deal with, like my mental health. What are the top things that need to happen, that I need to manifest so that my mental health is at, so that it's healthy. Okay, from there I move on to money. What is the what is the exact things that I need to do? What's the exact amount I need to make so that I'm in a place of financial freedom, so that I can give to mutual aid requests and take care of myself and take care of my children and deal with you know everything I'm going through medically with perimenopause and all of that.
Speaker 1:The next thing is dealing with relationships, and I don't mean like romantic relationships, I mean all the relationships in my life, realizing like who's causing me stress, who's not causing me stress, who's adding to my life, who's bringing joy, who is it nice to be around? What do I need to develop in myself so that I can be a better, for example, mother, mother to my daughter, mother to my sons. But part of the reason I said, like I said, I have no roster, nothing, a zero roster. This is the first time in such a long time that I have nothing, nothing and no one on the roster. First time in such a long time that I have nothing, nothing and no one on the roster. That's in part because I'm really realizing, like my girlfriends non-romantic girlfriends, I'm not gay in any way, but like my actual girlfriends, friends who are girls they bring me so much life and so much joy and so much peace. They actually care. Y'all know what I'm trying to say.
Speaker 1:When you have really good girlfriends that really know how to love you well, it can be very hard, in my opinion, as a single woman, to find a man who will love you as well as your girlfriends do, who will take care of you the way that they do, who will be as thoughtful and as kind and considerate and consistent. And so, yeah, I just started removing everyone on the roster, no matter what men, at least if they weren't bringing me the kinds of joy and peace and love and support and encouragement that my lady friends do really, really reduced stress in such a major way. Even just connecting to men initially in a talking phase can sometimes bring about a certain amount of stress. So I'm not out here telling y'all well, because the election, you have to stay single. I'm definitely not saying that and I definitely don't even think I will be single forever. But I do believe that we have to look at where we're at personally and where I was at personally is like I don't want anyone in my life at all who brings any modicum of stress outside of just being a parent, because being a parent in and of itself can be stressful, as y'all know, and so that is something that I am going to do, no matter what. So if I feel any sort of stress in any relationships, it's going to be the mother daughter stress Okay, the mother son stress, not some random man stress.
Speaker 1:And then the final thing on that list that you should be thinking about and prioritizing is your physical health. What are you doing to get your heart thumping a couple times a week? Are you strength training? Are you going for walks? Are you doing things that care for your body? Are you thinking about what do I need to eat so that my body is healthy? These are basic things, y'all, but I'm telling y'all, once I started January, for me it was like really January in general, because I had been ramping up to a lot of these changes.
Speaker 1:But once I started January after my birthday because my birthday is December 30. And I turned 48 December 30. And I always use my birthday as like for this next year what do I want to focus on during my 48th year. So it just happens to coincide with the new year, but really I was thinking about my 48th year. What do I want for my 48th year? And I had already been ramping up. I've been on the Galveston diet for the last six months. I'd already been ramping up with doing walks and weights and trying to be more active, and then in January I joined a gym. I had already been doing little things you know, just to pursue health in different ways, to sleep better, so I got some mouth sleep tape, which actually has helped me sleep better. By the way, I was already doing some things. I had just recently got diagnosed officially with ADHD and so I got some L-theanine.
Speaker 1:And I'm just giving you all little examples, like it's just constantly on my mind. Is it on your mind? These big areas what am I doing to keep my body healthy? What am I eating? How am I keeping it healthy physically? Relationships what am I doing so that I'm surrounding myself with positive, happy, peace-filled relationships? Money what am I doing so I can make more money and give more money and save more money and invest more money? And then mental health what are we doing to care for our mental health, to be sure that it's in a good place. These, literally, could be applied at any time, but it just feels like right now they're more important.
Speaker 1:So when I tell you, I'm focusing on that every single day, I'm focusing on those things every single day, trying to set myself up so that, when all of these things have more and more unbearable ramifications for more and more people around us, I can actually be strong and healthy and mentally prepared and financially prepared to actually do what I feel called to do when I'm ready to do it. The absolute worst thing for me would be to do when I'm ready to do it. The absolute worst thing for me would be to want to help or want to do something and just have my hands tied, which has happened to me so many times before. It's such a sad feeling. This is just my little encouragement to you to, yes, rest. Yes, take care of yourself. Yes, focus on your happiness. Yes, focus on your body. Yes, focus on just eating healthier. Yes, focus on taking time to meditate over doom scrolling. Yes, focus on how you can practice mindfulness.
Speaker 1:Yes, take time out from the endless news cycle. You know, I don't know if y'all need to hear that or not. If you need permission to hear it, I'm giving you permission because I'm taking that myself. I am stopping myself from looking at so much stuff, reading some from so much stuff about what's happening and realizing that in this moment I have air in my lungs and I can take a breath and I can find something to be grateful for, and in this moment I know my kids are safe and happy and healthy. In this moment there is no reason to feel guilt or shame about those realities, that we are provided for, that we have a home, etc. And in this moment I can be thankful that God has me in a right state of mind Because there could be a moment three months, six months, a year down the line where I need to make a choice, to do something hard and I can make a clear-headed choice that reflects my values and not out of just fear. I guess I just want you to know that if you take a break, if you take a rest, it does not mean that you're not concerned about poor people losing funding or DEI initiatives being cracked open or Ilanazi having access to our social security numbers. There are worrying things happening, but I do think that if we can look and say God has us, we are going to be okay and there is no battle that we can fight right in this moment, in this present moment that we're worrying, and that helps me.
Speaker 1:I try to think about my self-care and my ability to compartmentalize some of this stuff in a way, as a way to prepare me for a day where I might do something. I don't know what, but I'm part of the resistance. So one day I might be called upon to make a choice. I don't know what, but I'm part of the resistance. So one day I might be called upon to make a choice. I don't know what that choice could be. It could be to cut somebody out or more. I'm really just talking y'all. But I do think that it's better to think about our own lives as bigger and far beyond him, as someone who was a narcissistic abuse survivor and seeing him as the absolute narcissist who he is.
Speaker 1:I know we shouldn't armchair diagnose anybody, but if anybody has narcissistic personality disorder, it is Trump and Elanazi Okay, they both got NPD. But one thing that I know and I remember learning from surviving narcissistic personality disorder abuser is you don't obsess. You don't obsess over them. You have to stop obsessing over them and you have to worry about you yourself and your response to it. So this is a prep time. This is a preparation time for black women for us to really fully, fully focus on our own health in every way possible, because one thing we're not going to do is not be ready. We're going to stay ready. Okay, we're going to stay ready. Anyway, thank you for listening.
Speaker 1:This episode was a little bit different and a little bit all over the place, so thank you for being here. If you're not yet, please sign up for my newsletter. I'm going to start sending out a newsletter once a week. Hopefully. That way you can keep up to date with everything. And if you're not, follow me on instagram at grace underscore sandra underscore is my personal one and the podcast is the same name out here trying to survive. Same name on tiktok out here trying to survive.
Speaker 1:And finally, you might not know this, but I'm the author of a book called grace, actually memoirs of love, faith, loss and black womanhood. I have it here YouTube. You can pick this up on Amazon in digital or hard copy. And if you haven't yet, please leave me a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. I'm just new, again trying to get this podcast pushed out into the world. I would really, really value your honest feedback. Again, thank you for joining me again today. Just remember that you are very strong, very resilient and very capable of creating and choosing a life that you desire and deserve. Until next time, keep shining, y'all.
